


heartlines

by maigloeckchen



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: M/M, aph lithuania - Freeform, aph poland - Freeform, lietpol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-05-31
Packaged: 2020-04-05 07:57:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,153
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19044364
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/maigloeckchen/pseuds/maigloeckchen
Summary: Feliks learns to be a little more comfortable with himself around Tolys.





	heartlines

**1996**                

 

Feliks took a deep breath, smoothing his skirt—hoping it would wipe the sweat from his hands in the process—before timidly placing his hand on the doorknob. He had been so confident that Tolys wouldn’t judge him until that moment, just before showing him. He was suddenly glad he’d decided against wearing makeup—that would have been _far_ too much, he was sure—or maybe the fake earrings would be where Tolys would draw the line—instinctively, his hands flew to his ears to pull them off—

                He took another deep breath. He’d seen men in perfectly masculine clothes wearing earrings, this was fine. _Anyway, Tolys is the one with hair past his shoulders_ , he thought. Clenching his jaw, he grabbed the handle, still not turning it. The best thing to do was just get on with it—either Tolys wouldn’t care, and this worrying was for nothing; or he would, and it was best to just get that humiliation over with.

                He could feel his hands growing slick again; he grimaced. Couldn’t he at least _act_ confident? He’d done all sorts of crazy-ridiculous-stupid things without a second thought, why should _this_ make his lunch want to come back up? He rolled his shoulders to adjust his posture, then opened his bedroom door before he could talk himself out of it.

                Tolys was standing awkwardly in the middle of the room, as though Feliks had caught him in the middle of pacing; his face gave no indication of his thoughts on seeing him in red heels and a matching plaid skirt.

                “So, uh. What d’you think?” Feliks asked, voice an octave higher than usual, suddenly realizing how _very_ exposed his legs were—he was wearing a black turtleneck and below the waist felt practically naked by comparison though the skirt fell nearly to his knees. He’d considered adding fishnets, but, again, too much—

                Tolys seemed mildly surprised by the question. “I think you look great.”

                Feliks let go of a breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding. “You do?”

                Tolys nodded.

                “You’re not just saying that?”

                He opened his arms, and Feliks made his way over to him, keenly aware of how loud his shoes were on the wood floor, before burying his face into his chest and letting him wrap his arms around him. “I’d probably say that no matter what you wore, but I’d mean it every time,” Tolys said, running his fingers through Feliks’s hair.

                Feliks grabbed at his shirt to pull himself closer to him, his face hot. Tolys kissed the top of his head and started gently rubbing his back.

                “God, it was stupid of me to be so worried,” he muttered.

                Stepping back slightly, Tolys rested one hand on his shoulder, brushing his hair behind his ear with the other before holding his face. “Of course I’d never—Felek, I—I’d _never_ —”

                “I know. But—” his eyes were stinging. Of course.

                “Felek—”

                He couldn’t help sobbing as Tolys tried brushing his tears away. “I _know—_ “ He let him pull him into another hug before he gave in completely to the crying. So stupid—

                He had no idea how long they stood there, Tolys letting him sob into his shirt, arms wrapped tightly around him, but he was deeply embarrassed that it had happened at all.

                “’M sorry,” he said, his voice cracking.

                “Shh,” was Tolys’s response as he returned to petting his hair. “It’s okay.”

                Feliks nodded weakly, trying to focus on the sounds of Tolys’s breathing and heartbeat. Steady, grounding…. He pressed himself closer to his chest, inhaling the faint smell of cigarette smoke that clung to his clothes; he couldn’t help but find that comforting, too.

                “This isn’t at all what I’d pictured in my head,” he mumbled after several minutes, trying to lighten the mood. “I’d been thinking about—planning—this all week, somehow this never occurred to me.”

                Tolys laughed softly. “What _were_ you picturing?”

                “Uh….” His face was certainly red enough to match his skirt. “Mostly us having lots of sex. But I’m not really in the mood for that anymore.”

                Tolys laughed again and kissed his forehead. “We can have lots of sex another time, don’t worry.”

                “I’m not just wearing this because of that, though,” Feliks said, stepping back and stumbling in the heels.

                Tolys caught him by his arm. “I know.”

                “I—I know. But. I—it’s not like that. And it’s not, y’know…it’s not drag.”

                He nodded.

                “I just. For…. For a _really_ long time now, I’ve wanted…I’ve just wondered what it’d be like to…to dress like this. Y’know?”

                Again, Tolys nodded.

                “It doesn’t…it doesn’t really mean—I guess it doesn’t mean anything.”

                “Felek….”

                “And I know that you know—I—I guess….” He took a deep breath, pulling his shirt sleeves over his hands. “I think I just needed to say it out loud. For myself.”

                “I understand, dear.”

                He nodded curtly. “I do feel like an idiot now.”

                “I don’t think you’re an idiot, love.”

                Somehow, his face grew even warmer. “Thanks.”

                “Do you want me to go make some tea?”

                _I don’t deserve you_. “Uh…yeah. Yeah, that’d—that’d be nice, actually, thank you.”

                Tolys kissed his cheek. “I’ll be back in a few minutes, then.”

                Feliks sighed softly to himself as Tolys quietly left, then walked over to his bed, wincing—the shoes were brand new, and a bit too small. He happily slid them off once he was sitting on the edge of the mattress, his sore feet feeling like they were sinking into the floor. With another sigh, he fell backwards, arms outstretched. _That could have gone better_.

                Still, now he knew that Tolys didn’t care—next time would be much smoother. And would probably end with sex. That was always a bonus. He closed his eyes, letting his mind wander until he heard Tolys’s shuffling footsteps returning.

                “Oh, that smells amazing,” Feliks said, quickly moving to sit with his legs crossed, back against the headboard. Tolys smiled as he handed him the steaming mug, and he had to force himself not to immediately drink it—it was definitely still too hot.

                “I hope I added enough sugar,” Tolys said, sitting with his back against the footboard, legs stretched out, holding his own mug.

                “I don’t think you’ve ever once made me a bad cup of tea.”

                He grinned, and they lapsed into silence.

                “Hey, Liet,” Feliks said when he had finished his tea, “what are your thoughts on fishnets?”

                “Uh….”

                Frowning, he set the empty mug on his bedside table. “What…are your thoughts on fishnets on _me_?”

                Tolys shrugged. “Like I said, I think you’d look great in anything.”

                Feliks scrunched his nose; that wasn’t the kind of answer he was looking for.

                “Why fishnets specifically?”

                Heat rushed to his face again; he didn’t answer, but fidgeted with his skirt.

                “Ah.” A pause. “Just how much did you consider wearing today?”

                “Uh…I really only have this one…outfit. But. It’s uh…it’s a pretty full outfit.”

                Tolys nodded thoughtfully. “Next time…next time, you can wear the whole thing, if you want. It’s fine with me, if that’s what you’re worried about….”

                “Really?”

                “Of course.”

                “There’s uh. There’s makeup, too.”

                “That’s also fine.”

                Feliks exhaled. “I…I do actually have two different pairs of fishnets….”

                “Oh?”

                He nodded. “Yeah…a…a normal pair, and then some uh. Some thigh-highs.”

                “Ah.”

                “I was uh. Well, you know how I said I’d kinda envisioned us having a lot of sex?”

                “Yes.”

                “Well, I. I know you have a thing for—for sex with clothes on. And…I was thinking, you know, skirts are…pretty convenient for that.”

                “Right.”

                “Though, again, this isn’t exclusively for that.”

                Tolys nodded.

                “Anyway, the…regular pair, it goes up past the waistline of the skirt,” he said, drawing a line with his finger halfway up his torso to indicate exactly how high-waisted they were on him. “So, you can’t take them off without taking the skirt off, too. So, uh. Logistically. The thigh highs made more sense. Though in hindsight I do think they go better with the outfit, anyway.”

                There was a glint in Tolys’s eyes that told Feliks he was trying not to laugh.

                “So, I overthought it a bit, but—”

                “Ah, Felek, I expected nothing less from you.”

                He blushed. “I—hm. Actually, now that I think about it, they’d look better with garters…. Maybe I should have gotten underwear as part of the outfit. Or…should I just wear nothing under it next time?”

                Tolys laughed at that. “You really did think about the sex part a lot, didn’t you?”

                “Apparently not enough….”

                “Wear whatever you want, dear.”

                “Yeah, but what would you prefer?”

                “Surprise me,” Tolys replied, grinning.

                Feliks huffed. “Will you at least tell me if you prefer silk or lace?”

                “Hmm….”

                “Please? I need…I need a starting point.”

                “Lace, but I’d rather you be comfortable—”

                “You don’t mind me wearing lingerie?”

                Tolys shrugged. “I’d never considered it before now, but I don’t see why not. If anyone could pull it off, it’d be you.”

                “Oh, hush.”

                “I mean it!”

                “Hm.” He leaned forward, holding his hand out; Tolys gave him his mug, and he set it on the table before crawling across the bed to sit on Tolys’s lap. “I’d never considered the lingerie, either,” he admitted quietly. “But now I want to, y’know?”

                “I’d be happy to see you in it,” he said, hands on Feliks’s hips.

                He grinned, kissing his forehead; he could feel how high up his legs the skirt was pushed by straddling Tolys—now nearly his entire thighs were exposed…and he didn’t really care.

                “You said you weren’t in the mood for sex,” Tolys said, eyebrows raised.

                “I’m not. But I _am_ in the mood to give you a little sneak peek at next time,” he said, both hands gently cupping Tolys’s face.

                “Ah. Does that sneak peek include a kiss?”

                Feliks kissed his forehead again. “Not the free version.”

                Tolys laughed. “What do I have to do to get the paid one, then?”

                He grabbed one of Tolys’s hands and placed it on his thigh; he immediately began rubbing circles with his thumb, and a different sort of heat rushed to Feliks’s face. “You have to uh…keep doing that, first of all.”

                “Gladly. You’re absolutely right about how convenient the skirt is, by the way.”

                Feliks had no doubt Tolys had been in this position with someone wearing a skirt before, but he said, “Of course I am,” anyway.

                “Do you want me to do something with my other hand?” he prompted after a moment.

                “Uh…you can do whatever you want with it.”

                Tolys decided to keep it where it was.

                “Hm. How about…you have to take your shirt off. Or. Let me take it off for you so you can keep doing that thing with your thumb.”

                “That’s all?” A band of gold light from a crack in the curtains had fallen on the side of Tolys’s head, and Feliks brushed his hair back so he could admire all the shifting shades of brown and almost-red that were now visible.

                “Listen, my legs are _very_ exposed right now, so you have to expose something, too.”

                “My arms.”

                “Hush or no kiss.”

                “Go ahead, then.”

                Feliks leaned back slightly, brushing his fingertips across Tolys’s lips, then down his neck, letting them linger at the top button. “This green suits you, you know,” he murmured, before undoing the first few buttons.

                “Thank you.”

                “I’m glad you’re not wearing an undershirt, this would be a lot less sexy if you were.”

                Tolys laughed. “I nearly put one on this morning.”

                Feliks shook his head as he reached the last button, then pushed the shirt off of his shoulders—Tolys shrugged it the rest of the way off and tossed it on the floor. Running his hands down his scarred chest, Feliks considered teasing him again—kissing his cheek, maybe—but that felt a bit mean. Besides, he wanted to really kiss him; he straightened his back, meeting Tolys’s gaze, before he leaned forward and pressed his lips to his.

                Tolys returned one hand to his thigh, but used the other to pull him closer, deepening the kiss. Feliks wrapped his arms around his neck, tangling his fingers in his hair. He had forgotten, somehow, how much he loved the warmth of their bodies pressed together, how much he _needed_ for them to be even closer together—

                As though he’d read his mind, Tolys moved his hand to his back, grabbing the loose material of his shirt while pulling Feliks closer to him.

                “I love you,” he gasped when he forced himself to pull away, hands still tangled in his hair.

                “I love you, too,” Tolys replied, voice rough, before pulling him into a hug.

               

 

 

 

 


End file.
